Trying to keep my shit together as a mother, wife and business owner is a hard task, it’s no wonder that my blog has been none existent recently which I must add is bloody annoying and I must apologise.
Social media, mini blogs have become a little more prominent in my life as they are literally all I have time for.
Writing things down is my therapy and a massive hobby of mine so I have decided that a monthly update on life in general is an absolute must, I weirdly enjoy people laughing at my expense.
So the month so far – how has it been?
If you have been watching my Instagram Stories you may already know how my month is going but if I had to sum up the month of October in one word, I would definately opt for the word “shitty” not cause of any other reason other than the fact I am potty training George.
Now, the whole concept of “potty training” sounded cute and easy initially I must admit… I mean, I have taught numerous animals to poo and wee in a box or outside without too much trouble so how hard can a toddler be..? Man… I was so naive I am actually looking back in time at myself and saying “awwwww”
Turns out George finds it funny to pee on mummy… It almost became a game…
I have been pissed on obscene amounts of times, I have had more splash backs from pouring poop down the toilet than I have ever had from a frying pan and I have spewed on my own mouth at least dozen times.
Poo in a potty is very different to poo in a nappy.. I’m not sure why but it is no longer coming from a “cute baby” and I am finding it increasingly difficult to be happy when he just leaves a dump in the potty. I try my very best to fist pump the air and get excited for him when he curls one out but it’s hard when you know you are going to have to drop that “mountain of crap” into the toilet and no matter how fast you try to do the “drop and run” you will be splashed… The “drop and run” is something that I am sadly not getting any better at.
You see… the issue is that the consistency is always different… So you can’t really time it effectively.. some falls harder, some falls quicker, some falls messier and some doesn’t want to fall at all. I can’t help but wonder if the term “log flume” was invented by a poo drenched mum – it just seems so fitting!!
On a seperate note, George is now weirdly potty trained in the house if he has no pants on… but if he has pants on he just pees in them.. I have no idea how to transition as he can’t have his bare bum out forever? Then I start freaking out… what if he never does it? What if he ends up being a 30 year old man in nappies? What if our house stinks of wee and I am now just immune and no one tells me… what if we are nicknamed “the wee family“… Oh my …I couldn’t cope… but then I guess I wouldn’t know.. Would I?
Anyway enough about excrement for now… I promise I will be back soon, unless I drown in splash back – ahhh imagine!!!!