Top Tips for Co-parenting During the Christmas Holiday
23rd December 2024
Whilst the Christmas period can certainly be a wonderful time of the year, it is important to recognise that there are individuals and families experiencing their first Christmas following a separation or perhaps the first Christmas of sharing the festive period with a co-parent in which a parent may not have the children with them for Christmas. This can certainly be difficult to manage.
There are no strict rules or guidance as to the division of time between the children and separated parents but to assist parents in being able to reach an amicable agreement for the arrangements over the festive holiday and child arrangements in general, here are some tips:-
The child’s best interest
Above all else, it is important to focus on what is in the best interest of the child. Inevitably during holidays, unpreventable issues can arise which need to be resolved between the parents. Whilst this can be frustrating, it is important to take a moment and bring your focus back to the child. After all, most parents want their children to be happy and flourish. Your view as to what is best for the child may differ with the child’s other parent, although the law is clear that any judge’s focus will be on what is in the child’s best interest.
Respect the agreement and arrangements
Once arrangements have been made, it is the expectation of everyone, including the children, that those arrangements will happen. We know that these times are difficult for children of separated parents, and one way to minimise their stress is to stick to the agreed arrangements so there is no unnecessary conflict or distress. Again, it is important to remember the point above about the child’s best interest when thinking about changing plans at the last minute.
Transparency
If plans must change, to avoid causing the child/children any distress or uncertainty, explain this in neutral terms to the child so that they know what to expect and can raise any questions or concerns they may have.
Open communication
What if the child says they miss the other parent? Particularly so if this is a new arrangement for all involved but in any event, at this time of year, children may miss the other parent they are not with. There are so many options for communication these days to make it easy for the children to contact the other parent (likely with the support of their parents). Judges support reasonable indirect contact and crucially it will help the child if they can see that parent promoting contact with the other parent and will assist in reducing the possibility of the child feeling as though they are caught in the middle. Indirect contact should therefore not be unreasonably withheld.
Whilst the above is the ideal position, it is not always possible to co-parent and agree the arrangements.
If you are experiencing issues with your child/children’s co-parent in agreeing their arrangements or any other matters relating to a separation, please reach out to me, or any of our team for practical, focused advice and support.
You can contact Danielle on danielle.beesley@freeths.co.uk or by telephone at 01865 781031.
Danielle has specialised in all aspects of Family Law since 2015. Clients value Danielle’s compassionate, empathetic and logical approach, along with her high calibre client care which puts them at great ease, at a time which can be particularly daunting for them.
Danielle has experience in dealing with a wide range of legal matters relating to divorce, financial settlements arising from the breakdown of a relationship and matters relating to unmarried couples and cohabitation disputes. Danielle has also dealt with high conflict cases and matters involving domestic violence, including emotional and sexual abuse. Danielle has effectively assisted clients that have been the victims of domestic abuse that require injunctive relief in applications for non-molestation and occupation orders.
Danielle has extensive experience in assisting clients in sensitive public law children proceedings and also private children law matters. In particular child arrangements, prohibited steps orders and risk of abduction. In addition, Danielle has also successfully represented parents and grandparents where grandparents are seeking to re-establish or improve contact with their grandchildren. Danielle’s extensive experience and knowledge of public children law has proved of great value within private children law cases involving social services and/or a court appointed children’s guardian, particularly in cases of alleged parental alienation.
Danielle is an Associate Member of the Chartered Institute of Legal Executives (ACILEx) and is also a member of Resolution, a national organisation of professionals committed to the constructive resolution of family disputes. Danielle advocates resolving family issues as amicably and cost-effectively as possible, particularly where children are involved, striving to resolve issues outside of the Court, wherever possible.
