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How Do You Tell Your Toddler You’re Expecting?

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Ok… Now before you jump to any conclusions… NO I am absolutely not!!!

A big question that many parents ask is “how do you tell your toddler your expecting?”.

Telling your Toddler You are Pregnant

Many parents claim that the moment they tell their little one the exciting news about a future siblings arrival it has been a little….. disappointing! We all envision that the special announcement will involve a leap in the air, a fist pump and maybe even a tear of joy, but in reality, once many parents tell their little one the exciting news about the expectant new sibling, they are left with nothing but an array of difficult questions and little but no excitement. It’s not surprising really, I mean think about it, it must be a little difficult to understand that there is a baby growing in your mummy’s tummy. It can be hard for a toddler to process that they are now going to share their parents with another sibling. George seems to think Rambo the Cat is his brother so you can imagine how confused he would be if I told him I was expecting.

In addition to the million questions of “how, why and when” it can also be difficult to explain to a child why mummy is sick, tired or can’t do certain things anymore. Many children could see all the changes as a negative, when in fact we want to create positive relationships between siblings before he or she arrives.

So how can you prepare your toddler for your new baby in a positive way?

The great news is that there is now a book out there designed especially for this called “Let’s talk to Mummy’s Tummy”

How do you tell your toddler you're expecting 1

Let’s Talk to Mummy’s Tummy Review

This educational and positive book has been written by the talented Helen A. Lacey and beautifully illustrated by the wonderful Carla Moreno.

 The purpose behind the Let’s Talk to Mummy’s Tummy Book

The book has been designed to addresses potential concerns or questions that a child may have all in a positive child-focussed manner.

How do you tell your toddler you're expecting 1

 

Let’s Talk to Mummy’s Tummy Book

When you open the book you will see 8 milestone stickers attached for your child to stick on the relevant pages. The sticker milestones begin at 12 weeks and has a picture of the fruit or vegetable every 4 weeks to update your child on their brothers or sister’s growth.

The beginning of the beautifully illustrated book concentrates on finding out how your little one is feeling, raising any potential questions and also ensuring that your little one is aware their new sibling will not be coming for quite some time yet. It cleverly brings the attention back to your little one by speaking about what they were like as a baby, it also raises any potential issues that can affect your child such as mummy being sick and tired and reassures them that this is only temporary.

How do you tell your toddler you're expecting 1

Week by week, the book raises issues to prepare your child for their sibling and week by week your little one is greeted with a message from their new brother or sister intertwined with lots of interesting facts to ensure your little one is involved as much as they can whilst promoting a positive bond from the very beginning.

Filled with fun interactive elements such as tasks and the special ‘flip effect’ throughout the pages that brings the sibling to life, this book is the perfect way to help a child to understand pregnancy and be prepared for what to expect when their brother or sister arrives.

 

Our Review of Let’s Talk to Mummy

This book is fantastic and I actually got a little emotional reading it. This is a fantastic book to read with your little ones and a great way for them to feel included in your pregnancy whilst preparing them for the changes the new arrival will bring. This book forms a strong bond between your child and their sibling from the beginning and cleverly gives your new baby a voice so that your little one can interact with their sibling and carry out tasks such as cuddling and touching mummy’s bump.

To be totally honest with you, this book has made me completely broody. I would absolutely purchase this book if I ever did have a baby in the future and I would really enjoy reading this book with George.

This book is the ideal tool for any expectant parent who has another child or children. I must admit that I found this book a refreshing change from most pregnancy based books out there as it focuses on your child’s thoughts and feelings. It encourages engagement between siblings and is enjoyable for mum and child to both take time out of their hectic lives to bond with bump. Interacting with your bump is also now proven to support your unborn child’s brain development.

 

The book covers a range of topics including;

Where the baby will sleep

Names

Baby crying

How will you wash the new baby

What the Baby will eat

plus many more.

This book can be used time and time again without getting repetitive as the book encourages discussions around different topics. Different children will have different thoughts and views.

We have awarded “Let’s Talk to Mummy’s Tummy” with our recommended on badge.

You can purchase this book direct from the authors website. It’s also available on Amazon.

 

Follow Helen A. Lacey on her website;

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Getting Ready for a Baby

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Having a baby, especially your first, is an incredibly exciting time. There are also a few worries in the mix of emotions, too, though. Chief among these concerns is whether the baby is going to be alright, followed by how you’re going to afford it!
Some surveys have found that new parents spend up to £10,000 on their baby’s first year – the cot, the pram, clothes, nappies, formula, car seats, toys and special food being just some of the items on the shopping list. You don’t have to spend this much if you don’t want to, though, as there’s lots of ways to reduce this expensive first year’s costs.

Work out how much you can afford

Whether you’re embarking on this journey with your partner or going it alone, you have to work out how much you’ll have to spend and what you’re going to spend it on. Use this handy budget calculator to work out your finances for the next 18 to 20 months (the pregnancy period and baby’s first year or so) to pin down how much you’ll have coming in and how much will be going out. Then you can start using these bright ideas to curb your spending.

Start looking for bargains as soon as possible

You can join local marketplace groups to keep an eye out for equipment – large and small – as soon as you feel comfortable. For some people, this is after the 12-week scan and for others this may come later. The sooner you start looking for prams, cots and bundles of clothes, however, the more you’ll have amassed while you’re still working. You’ll also get to know the market and the territory and soon you’ll be bidding like a pro!

Enter magazine and online competitions

You may think that you never win anything, but by dedicating an hour or so a week to entering baby magazine and website competitions, you may just strike it lucky a few times. Most magazines have giveaway competitions and you should enter as many as you can – sometimes the giveaways are little things like teething rings and sometimes they’re biggies like travel systems and cots. If you don’t try, you’ll definitely not win anything.

Try to live off just one salary for a month

You’ll probably be taking at least nine months’ maternity leave. During maternity leave, if you’re an employee, you’ll get six weeks on full pay followed by a period of reduced pay until you return. If you’re self-employed you’ll probably get Maternity Allowance, which isn’t a huge amount. A good savings tip is to live for a month off your partner’s salary to see how it goes and to squirrel away yours for your period of leave.

Don’t buy everything on the “must buy” list in those magazines

There are some things that you’ll buy and never use! Listen to friends, family and forums and don’t bother with wipe warmers, baby food-processors and nappy bins. Just don’t! Similarly, when you are making the big purchases – the pram and the cot – think about how long you can use it for. Many cots turn into toddler beds so you’ll get three or four years’ use out of them. Many prams are also designed to go from new born to toddler (with the help of some engineering wizardry) so you’ll only need to buy one.

Why you should have a 3D/4D HD Live Bonding Scan? And what are the benefits?

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From the moment you get your positive pregnancy test you are aware that a little person is growing inside of you. It’s the start of a blossoming relationship which is everlasting. That bond between mother and child has begun and gets stronger and stronger as the days go by. Ultrasound allows expectant parents to watch this journey. Whilst ultrasound allows the performance of pregnancy screening tests such as the nuchal scan, non-invasive prenatal testing, anomaly scan (which allows assessment of the development of the fetal anatomy), ultrasound also allows you to take a sneak peek at your developing baby.

Why you should have a 3D/4D HD Live Bonding Scan? And what are the benefits?

Ultrasound emerged in maternity during the 1950’s. Since then there has been a revolution and the speed of the technological advancement has been astonishing. At first there was 2 Dimension (2D), then 3D and now 4D. 2D is the black and white grey scale image that is the standard for doing most fetal ultrasound work and this is also amazing because this allows assessment of fetal structures and fetal growth.

3D allows you to see still realistic images of your baby. It can be possible to recognise features and parents often say “that’s your nose” or “he or she looks just like me”. It cements the bonding between expectant parents and their fetuses. The 3D images can be rotated so you see the fetus at different angles. However, 3D is surpassed by 4D because 4D shows the real time movement of the fetus. Intricate facial features in real time are obtained. Smiles, grimaces, thumb-sucking, swallowing, body movements, all are plain to see on 4D bonding scan.

In terms of 3D/4D technology, the crème de la crème is the HD Live technology.

You will often hear this mentioned when you look up baby scans, but what does it really mean. Well, you are in for a treat. HD Live is an amazing method of showing the fetus in its best light. HD Live uses an amazing technique called rendering to show remarkably realistic images of the fetus. The fetal skin is illuminated using a virtual light source which creates contrasting shadows and shows the fetus in its best light. You will be amazed that the fetal skin looks so real and translucent.

3D/4D scans are best done between 28 and 32 weeks although they can be done earlier. This is because later in pregnancy the fetus gets bigger and begins to position itself in the pelvis, getting ready for labour. The more advanced you are in pregnancy, the less likely you will obtain good images.

A scan during the 3rd trimester, whilst providing an opportunity to see the fetus in 3D/4D HD Live is also a chance to check the growth and wellbeing of the fetus. The wellbeing scan can assess the fetal growth, amniotic fluid around the fetus and look at the blood flow in the umbilical cord (umbilical artery Doppler). If you did not want to know the gender and cannot resist then it’s not too late to find out! Scans in later pregnancy also inform you of the way the fetus is lying down in your pelvis (presentation).

These scans are additional scans and not routinely available but can provide more reassurance that all is well if required. Family and friends can share in the joy and excitement of the scans.

Question: So why you should have a 3D/4D HD Live Bonding Scan?

Answer: All of the above applies.

The Aster Baby Scan Clinic Dunstable

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This expert article was written by Dr. Jacqueline Bamfo from The Aster Baby Scan Clinic in Dunstable

https://www.asterbabyscan.com/

If Carlsberg did Gender Reveals………….!!

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Since that day, we decided to make “Goodwings Epic Gender Reveals” into a registered company, as we wanted other people to experience the sheer joy we felt at finding out in such a unique and dynamic way and due to it being an amazing experience that your loved ones can also share with you and remember fondly for many years to come.

Read more →

Screening During Pregnancy

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Congratulations … YOUR PREGNANT.

As soon as you find out you are pregnant contact your GP to schedule your first appointment. This is usually midwife at around 8 weeks from your last period. In the meantime, if you do experience any bleeding, abdominal pain or vomiting please contact your GP immediately as you may need to be seen earlier than arranged.

You may wish to speak with your GP sooner if you are taking any other medications that you feel could be harmful to the baby.

Your first visit is usually the longest, the midwife usually takes a urine and blood sample and asks lots of questions about family history. The questions about family history are usually about immediate family.

What are screening tests?

Screening tests will be offered during pregnancy. These are carried out to try to find any health problems that could affect you or your baby, such as Down’s syndrome, or physical abnormalities, the screening helps ensure that the correct care is put in place to help mummy and baby.

During pregnancy the tests carried out to check the baby are either via ultrasound scans which pick up physical abnormalities, such as spina bifida or a cleft lip or via blood tests which can help detect the risk of inherited disorders such as sickle cell anaemia and downs syndrome.

What are the risks involved?

Screening tests in pregnancy can mean that you and your partner are faced with difficult decisions. For example, if your bloods come back and the chances of down’s syndrome is high this could lead to a difficult decision about whether to have a diagnostic test that carries a possible risk of miscarriage. If you decided to go ahead with the diagnostic test, you could then be faced with another difficult decision if the results are positive. You will be asked to decide if you want to continue with your pregnancy or not.

When will I be offered different screenings?

Different screening tests are offered at different times during pregnancy.

The blood test for hereditary diseases like sickle cell anaemia should be offered before 10 weeks.

You will be offered screening for Down’s syndrome around the time of your dating scan, which happens when you are around 11 to 14 weeks pregnant.

You will be offered screening for abnormalities at a mid-pregnancy scan when you are around 18-21 weeks pregnant.

 Your Choice?

Although the NHS recommend certain tests you must remember that it is completely your choice whether or not you take the screening tests.

What You Need to Know About Labour

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Unless you have been pregnant before you have no idea what labour will be like and the unknown is quite scary. You find yourself asking your friends and family for their childbirth stories and quite frankly a lot of the time you wish you had never bothered, they all seem to finish their stories with “but it’s so worth it in the end” which really does not help the feelings of panic and anxiety at all.

When I was pregnant I would ask the midwife and friends… “how will I know when I’m in labour” and their responses were “you’ll just know”…. GREAT thanks for that!!!!

Signs and Symptoms that You Could Be Going in to Labour

There are a few signs that labour is starting these can be;

  • Waters breaking
  • Back ache
  • Urge to go to the toilet (the baby is pressing on your bowel)
  • A bloody show (the plug of mucus from the cervix has come away)
  • Regular contractions

What happens when your waters break?

After the many pregnancy chick flicks I have watched in my time, I always assumed that there would be a huge gush of water just before labour begins however this is not the case most of the time the waters break during labour.

If your waters do break you may feel a slow trickle, or a sudden gush of water that you cannot control. It can be difficult to tell amniotic fluid from urine as it can be similar in colour (straw like colour). When your waters break, the water may be a little blood-stained to begin with.

Keep a close eye on the colour of the waters, it should not be cloudy or smelly, also ensure that you are not losing blood as this could mean that you and your baby require urgent attention.

Remember that without amniotic fluid your baby is no longer protected and there is a risk of infection. If your waters break before labour starts, phone your midwife right away.

So What Do Contractions Feel Like?

Contractions are your uterus tightening and then relaxing, they are often described as a stronger version of period pains. The contractions are pushing your baby down and opening your cervix (entrance to the womb), ready for your baby to go through. When you start having regular and more painful contractions that feel stronger and last more than 30 seconds, labour may have started.

It is likely that your midwife will advise you to stay at home until your contractions become frequent. Call your midwife when your contractions are lasting between 30-60 seconds and occurring every five minutes, call your midwife for advice.

Tips on How to Cope Once Labour Begins

  • Keep moving – this can take your mind of the pain and the gravity helps pull the baby downwards.
  • Drink plenty – Keep energy levels up by drinking plenty of sports drinks.
  • Have a snack – Eat snacks if you can to help with your energy levels if you feel up to it. This can sometimes be difficult as many women don’t feel very hungry at this time.
  • As the contractions get stronger and more painful, you can try relaxation and breathing exercises – your birth partner can help by doing these with you.
  • Your birth partner can rub your back as it can help relieve pain.
  • If you have a tens machine start using it now.

So When should you go to the hospital or birth centre?

If you are experiencing contractions and you are unsure when you should go to the hospital, it is best to call the maternity unit for advice. The last thing you want to do is drive all the way to the hospital to be told to go home.

If you are having contractions but your waters have not yet broke. You will most likely be told to wait until your contractions are:

  • regular and strong
  • about five minutes apart
  • lasting about 45-60 seconds

It is important to remember that second babies often arrive more quickly than the first so phone your midwife a little earlier than you normally would.

Don’t forget your notes and remember to phone the hospital or unit before leaving home so they are aware that they are expecting you.

If you are planning a home birth, follow the procedure you have already agreed with your midwife.

Take a tour of your maternity unit before the big day

Speak to your midwife about having a tour of the maternity unit before the big day.

If you have any special requests that you would like during your childbirth experience speak to your midwife so that she can ensure your desires are met or if they cannot be met she can explain why they can’t.

Maternity Unit

Take your notes to the maternity unit’s reception. You will then be taken to the labour ward where you can change into a hospital gown or other clothes of your own. Choose something that is loose, light and ideally made of cotton so that you don’t get too hot. Ensure you are keeping your energy levels up by having plenty of snacks and energy boosting drinks.

The Midwifes Examination

The midwife will ask you for more information on what has been happening and then she will proceed to examine you further;

The midwife will:

  • take your pulse, check your temperature and blood pressure.
  • check your urine
  • check the baby’s position by feeling your abdomen.
  • record or listen to your baby’s heart
  • check how far your labour has progressed by completing an internal examination to see how far your cervix has opened.

These checks will be repeated at intervals throughout your labour.

Remember to show the midwife your birth plan so they can try and meet your wishes.

Delivery rooms

Delivery rooms have become a lot homelier than they used to be. Most delivery rooms now have chairs, bean bags, birthing balls and mats. This means that you can move about in labour and change position to get more comfy. Some have baths, showers or birthing pools. You should feel comfortable in the room where you are giving birth.

Water births

If you are interested in a water birth speak with your midwife about this beforehand to ensure that your hospital has the facilities for this and they can make the arrangements for this well in advance.

 

What to Expect When Having a C-section

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When I was told that I would have to have a C-Section I was secretly happy… truth is I was actually terrified of pushing a baby out of my lady bits and after spending a lot of time on the maternity unit and hearing a lot of women in labour, it put me off a vaginal birth completely. I was actually glad I was having a C-section. I had never watched “one born every minute” and I wasn’t about to start either.

Operation Preparation

Initially you will be asked to sign consent forms, your doctor will go through the risks attached when having the operation. Although the risks may seem scary it is important to not to worry, remember that C-sections are carried out every single day and doctors and nurses know exactly what they are doing.

Your obstetrician and the anesthesiologist will most likely choose a spinal block to numb you so that you don’t feel anything from the rib cage down. A spinal block is an injection that goes in to your back. You will then drink a chalky substance called Bicitra this helps neutralize your stomach acids. You will then be given a catheter and IV.

You will then head in to the operating room where you will meet your partner, they will be wearing scrubs and a mask. You will be moved on to the operating table and a curtain will be pulled across your midsection so that you can’t see what’s going on (it won’t be the nicest of sights).

You will be shaved so that the incision can be made clearly and accurately. You scar is usually the length of your middle finger.

The operation usually takes 40 – 50 minutes in total.

The Delivery

You may feel prodding or pulling but let me assure you… this is completely painless. It is at this point that the doctor usually reaches his or her hand underneath the baby’s head so that they can safely pull the baby out. Your baby then is cleaned and placed in the “warmer,” which has radiant heat above it and keeps the baby’s body temperature steady. You normally get to see your baby before they are whisked away for care.

The doctors and nurses then begin to sew you back up which usually takes the longest as they have to put you back together like a jigsaw.

You’ll spend about an hour in the recovery room and you will be attached to a heart monitor and an oxygen saturation monitor which will be attached to your finger. You will feel your legs coming slowly coming back to life and may be offered morphine to help ease the pain.

The Recovery

You will need a lot of rest as your body is just beginning the recovery process. You will need to wear pads as you will be bleeding for at least a few days (I was bleeding for about a week). Your painkillers may be fed through a pump or given orally.

The catheter is usually taken out on the second day and you may feel like the nurses are pushing you to walk before you are ready. The thought of having to walk to the bathroom for a wee scares the hell out of you let alone the thought of a shower. it’s always important to get your body moving and working again quickly after surgery.

From the third day midwives will be starting to try to get you ready for home. If you’re still really tired, push for as long a hospital stay as possible to rest because once you get home it is all go.

Once you get home it is important to rest as much as possible. At around 3 weeks post op, I began to feel like I was really getting there and started to do a lot more than I should have and I ended up getting an infection. I had to go to the doctors and get some antibiotics. After 5 weeks I made the same mistake again and ended up bedridden with the strongest antibiotics possible.

When Do Babies Get Hair?

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“When do babies get hair” is a common question that many expectant mothers and new mothers ask. Babies develop hair all over their body and not just on their head.

When Do Babies Get Hair On Their Body?

The hair that babies develop first is on their body is called Lanugo. Babies usually develop Lanugo around the 13th week of pregnancy. The hair is very thin, soft and is usually unpigmented. The reason babies develop Lanugo is to protect the baby and keep them warm in the womb whilst their skin is thin and they are still developing. The Lanugo is normally gone before birth, however on occasion can still be present at birth, however it will disappear itself a few weeks later.

When Do Babies Get Hair On Their Head

Babies start to grow hair around the 14th week of pregnancy. Tiny hairs begin to show on the hairline at a slight angle however some babies appear to be born with no hair and some babies can be born with a full head of thick hair. Babies born with hair often lose it by 6 months and sometimes the mature hair grows back right away but on other babies it can take a little longer. When hair does grow back it can grow back in a totally different colour and texture. Baby hair and mature hair grow at different rates and just because your baby was born with a full head of hair does not mean that it will grow back any quicker.

Hair Colour, Volume and Texture

In the womb you will not see curly blonde locks or frizzy black hair. The hair in the womb is pigment free and looks bright white during pregnancy. Your babies’ hair will shed and re grow again between months 3 – month 7 however, you will have to wait until your little one is 2 years old before his or her terminal (the hair they will sport in to adulthood) hair to grow.

Eyelashes and Eyebrows

Eyelashes and Eyebrows begin to grow around week 22 of pregnancy. Initially they do not have any colour and are bright white. The eyebrows and eyelashes continue to grow afterbirth.

 

Strep B Test During Pregnancy?

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Strep B Test During Pregnancy?

Group B Streptococcus (also known as GBS or Group B Strep) is a bacteria that lives in your body. 33% of us carry GBS without even knowing, some women can carry GBS in their vagina and would not know as there are no symptoms. During labour GBS can be passed on from you to your baby and although it is very rare it can make your new born baby seriously ill or in some cases it can cause death.

GBS is the most common cause of infection in newborns and between 300 – 350 babies develop a GBS infection each year. The infection can then lead to something called Neonatal sepsis which takes place as a result of the body attacking itself when trying to fight off the infection.

Facts about GBS

Most babies exposed to GBS are healthy and suffer no illness of infection. Only 1 in 2000 babies suffer with the infection. Sadly of the babies that do suffer with the infection 1 in 10 of those babies will die. You should be checked for GBS before labour and the chance of it spreading to your baby is very rare if you have the correct medication before delivery. I thought that because I had a caesarean I would be ok however GBS can still be passed on to your baby, I never had a GBS test in pregnancy. Please ensure you speak to the midwife about being tested before delivery. A lot of the time GBS is not discussed and people are unaware of the dangers.

Am I carrying GBS

Your midwife should discuss GBS with you at one of your appointments however, if you midwife was anything like mine it was not discussed at all and in fact I did not know it existed until after George was born and it was on daytime TV.  I was really disappointed with my midwife for not discussing this with me.  There is a simple strep b test during pregnancy that can be taken. The strep b tests are not often recommended as just because you test positive to does not mean that you will test positive later in pregnancy or closer to birth. I do think that everyone should be aware of strep b and the possible effects and a test should be offered.

Risk of Developing A GBS Infection

There are a number of factors that determine how likely it is of your baby developing a GBS infection.

These include;

  • If you go in to labour prematurely, before 37 weeks of pregnancy
  • If your waters break 18 hours or more before you give birth
  • If a previous step b test during pregnancy came back positive
  • If you have a fever of 38 degrees C or more

Avoiding GBS

If your doctor feels you are high risk your doctor will immediately give you antibiotics via drip in your arm to reduce the risk. These are given before labour from when your waters break until your baby’s birth.

If you are having a planned caesarean you will only be given antibiotics if your waters have broken or your labour has already started.

Symptoms of a GBS infection in a baby

 

  • Poor feeding
  • Lethargic
  • Making strange noises like grunting
  • Low blood pressure
  • Very high or very low temperature
  • Very high or very low breathing rate

Pregnancy Bag Checklist

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If this is your first baby, you may be wondering what on earth you need to pack for the hospital. You don’t want to end up with your whole house in a bag but you do want to make sure you have everything you need. The hard thing about packing your bag is that you never know how many days you could end up in hospital for.

When to pack your bag

I think it is important to have a bag packed at least a month before you give birth. I was actually nearly 7 weeks early and it was an emergency so I didn’t have anything with me. My husband packed a bag for me and all that was in it was my ipad, a pair of PJ bottoms a daytime top and a charger… needless to say I sent him home with a list and he still came back with the wrong things (mennnn).

I have put together a list of the things that are absolutely required as well as some nice extras whilst you are waiting to meet your bundle of joy.

Birth plan as well as all medical notes

Maternity bras, nursing bra and breast pads and big comfortable knickers (disposable knickers are also good)

A couple of sets of loose clothing for labour and for walking round the ward. *

Snacks, water, drinks for labour and for if you need to stay in hospital ( there is never enough food in the hospital meals if you have to stay in)

Toiletries, including lip balm, hair bands and hairbrush

Towels

1 pack maternity pads (hospital do often provide these but you will need them at home anyway)

Loose PJ’s (front-opening options will make breastfeeding easier)

Dressing gown (I loved having my dressing gown for comfort)

Slippers (make sure the soles have grip as the hospital ward floor can be very slippy)

Bag for dirty clothing

Phone and charger

IPAD or tablet

Music on an ipod or MP3

Books and magazines

Birth ball

Tens machine if you are wanting to try using one

Water spray to cool you down during labour

Extra pillow

Make up (If your anything like me I wanted to stick some make up on before any visitors arrived and before any pictures were being taken)

Hot water bottle, for backache.

List of phone numbers so your partner can text everyone once the baby has arrived safe.

Your favourite sweet treat for after you have given birth (a reward which is much deserved)